This was taken at Gatorland.

“What were you doing in Hattiesburg?”

“Kickin’ it.”

This was taken at Gatorland.

Dio died from stomach cancer today. He was 67. He was one of the first and best metal singers to ever live. This sucks a lot. When I had heard that he had stomach cancer and then didn’t hear much else I was afraid that one day I’d have to write this. I actually delayed this blog post for many hours hoping that I would hear that it was a hoax.

Here he is in one of his most famous songs. Holy Diver:

What a shitty year for metal. First we lose Pete Steele and now this.

Link.

This was taken at Gatorland.

Back in the High School I was in theatre. A pro theatre company sent their actors to our inner city school to teach us. That was some fun times. We got to legally cut class for a few hours and plan out all kinds of crazy productions.

All of the girls thought Roy was hot. Roy was one of the actors who was sent there to teach us. Every time he came into the room all of the girls pretty much passed out on each other. I didn’t care one way or the other. He was OK. Whatever. I never had a “boy crazy” phase. I was a lot like Daria – a cynical realist. I could see why the girls liked him, though.

One day he fell asleep backstage during rehearsal. Some of the girls thought it would be funny to put nail polish on one of his hands. He woke up and became horrified. Like, he couldn’t deal with it at ALL. It’s just nail polish, but he was freaking out as if it were a tattoo or something. He actually ran off in a panic to get it off. I think he may have snapped at someone, too.

For some reason, no one really thought he was hot after that.

I guess the moral of the story is to be confident with your testicles. Girls often like to feminize boys that they like. It’s silly, but usually harmless. If the guy flips out and absolutely can’t deal it is the biggest turn off. If a girl is chasing a guy around with lipstick, she probably wants to touch his penis. So my message to guys is to be confident with your testes and PARTY ON DOODZ.